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Name: Carissa
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Member Since: 7/19/2006

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Monday, April 05, 2010

My schedule

My schedule for this term
(I'm writing this to clear my head, by making a list my semester doesn't seem so intimidating)

Psych Nursing aka NRS 211

10 question quiz- April 6
~Art room for shellacking April 7 2pm
=Work 8am- April 8th
~Art Paper due, and art test- April 8th
Quiz #1- April 12
AA Paper due-April 19
Unit 1 Exam-April 22
=I'm going to see a show at CSI April 23rd, I need to i miss it so much
Assessment Paper due-April 26
Care Plan due-May 4
Quiz #2- May 6
Unit 2 Exam-May 10
Quiz #3-May 17
Nursing Final May 20th
Art Review immediately after Nursing final

ok...  i can do this :)




Sunday, February 21, 2010

free write

I;m just trying type as much as I can, I remember doing a free write and that pretty much meant that I couldn't stop writing until the teacher said time was up. BUt even if we didn't know what to write we could just write nonsense or the ever popular "I DON"T KNOW WHAT TO WRITE"....one kid did about 5 pages of it...
I couldn't do that, I'd get bored by the third time i wrote that.
I haven't written in such a long time period not just on xanga.
 I did write two poems though, they're pretty promising but I still need to do some revising.

I guess I can start with my life as of now....
SO far so good  with school, next test is March 4th
same for my friends, I'm even making some new ones. We aren't close but my friends in nursing class are very fun and dare I say "out there" kind of like me Only worse... I guess I chose the right profession after all.
Not to mention I have a sick love for nursing, even cleaning up after the unconscious patients soiled themselves doesn't gross me out in the least bit...though maybe that's because I learned how to breathe through my mouth.
I love the hospital I'm in, it's small but I'm seeing alot of things there, I may even want to work there when I get out. The place is the cleanest hospital I've ever seen, and the staff is very pleasant as well.
Even my professors are great, and I mean that they are both wonderful teachers with even better personalities.
As for my love life.... I do like this one young man. He is very kind, deep in thought (better said he's a very deep person or at least his thoughts are), appreciates things like literature and poetry just like I do(sometimes moreso than I do) but plainly said we have alot in common. He has no major problems he's a perfectly good upstanding law-abiding citizen, for the most part.
The only thing that is unfortunate is that I don't want a relationship right now.
Go figure nothing is ever perfect. And love of course is never convenient
I finally got the courage to tell him that. He says he's ok with it, but he's just scared. He claimed he didn't want to lose me because "You're everything I've ever wanted."
I retort, love is never convenient
Granted he has to respect my decision no matter what I decide to do - I wouldn't have it any other way- but I understand the fear of having future that's not certain. Better yet going from a path to a unknown trail. 
I was on a path before, one that was practically composed of stone, then somehow that path just ended and I made my own way. And to be honest I like walking a dirt trail in the forest rather than a concrete pathway, granted I feel that way because I have the tools and the flexibility I need to get where I need to be. However I didn't realize I had all I needed until I took the risk and began walking.
He has to do the same, start walking.

I don't know where we'll go or where we both will end up but I'll still be your friend when we get there



Saturday, January 23, 2010

Killing Trees and Time

I'm printing out ridiculous amounts out work for nursing, articles, slide shows, and assignment instructions. I now need more paper and a new ink cartage. Off to staples, the only store I have a members club card to...and soon Scrub Stuff will be next.
I got some very encouraging words from many people in the first month of 2010, I have people in my life I probably don't deserve but I'm glad they're in it. Some of those words were about my personality, some about my career and others were just nice to hear...My ears were ringing with the sound of those words.
However, actions speak louder than words and I need to take some action.
I need to take care of myself, though I love and appreciate all the support I've gotten from so many compassionate people in 2009, some things I have to handle on my own. I cannot let myself become frightened of a teacher because I fear they'll fail me no matter what I do. I noticed when it came to that, when I stopped caring a little bit, I did significantly better. Also sometimes words shouldn't be taken seriously, after all they're just sounds for the most part. And of all places I'm quoting Glee when Sue Sylverter said to be a success you must believe you already are one because "whether they're cheering or booing either way they're just making alot of noise."

I know I can do this no matter how long it takes. I still have a fail and a drop so it's not as much pressure as some have. I realize now that the only way a clinical professor can fail me is if I walk out of the hospital before she dismisses us and other than that I just have to practice what I have learned. If all goes to plan I've got nothing but time and no one can stop time.
Keep calm and keep plugging away
Thank you to everyone who's been so understanding and supportive I think you all know who you are
:)

Class begins Jan 28th
Med surge 3 ends March 23rd
Psych Nursing Begins March 25
Sppring break is March 29-April 5th
Classes ends May 17th



Sunday, November 15, 2009

Wish List

A few people have asked me what I want for Christmas this year and while most of the time I say
"I don't know," because I really don't know, I forget the things that I want as the year goes by (perhpas it's because I didn't really want those things all that much).
However this time, I made a wish list in no particular order...
(Some of the things on here I'll have to get myself, but no matter)
WISH LIST:

  1. I want to pass the nursing program, I don't care how long it takes me. I want it, and I'll find a way.Even if I have to re-take Nursing 120 or even go to a new school, I'm doing it. I don't think I need to explain why I want this
  2. A new pair of pajamas(or night gown) and slippers, because my slippers are so worn out they can talk to you and because my favorite pj's shrunk in the wash. I don't care so much as to how they look but more about the fact that they keep me warm and are soft.
  3. A pedicure, no real reason here I just want to do something "girly" considering I forget I'm a woman during school, so I think this may be needed.
  4. Oil and scent free cream, because constant hand washing dries out my hands. However scents can aggravate a patient's allergies and oils...well b/c it doesn't work too well when you work with a patient who has an oxygen tank...
  5. I'd like a day out where me and my friends could go somewhere we've never been I guess, have a little adventure
  6. I'd also like a night in, I'd have my friends over and we'd all bring/cook one item of  food to the house and we'd eat, drink and be merry.
  7. A travel mug, so I can drink my tea in the morning on the way to school...and so I can stop taking my dad's mug.
  8. A [LEGITIMATE]  full body massage...I stress the word legitimate. It's a wish list so I can dream, but if anyone knows how to get one of these (hopefully for a reasonable to cheap price) let me know, I'll be on the table faster than you can say 'Happy Ending' lol.
There it is my wish list for this year, if I can get one of anything on this list I'll be ecstatic, especially if it's number 1. One of these days I'll organize numbers 5 and 6 , then after classes end, my friends and I will have a grand old time and make up for time apart.
I've been studying since 10am, and sometimes when I hear mom or John talking about doing something like hanging out or going out with friends...to be honest I get jealous for a moment. I feel like in the beginning of college I went from being independent and social to dependent and isolated. I'm not the only one, my professor Mrs Como even said she felt the same way when she was in my shoes. But it'll be worth it real soon, it's going to pay off.
For now I get my kicks in the skills lab by irragating an NG tube, orally or nasally suctioning one of the manikins, cathterizing the "anatomically correct" female, suctioning a trach, and cleaning it off.

Giving meds on the 17th and 30th
I'm team leader on the 23rd
Exam #3 24th
Case study due Dec first (I finished it already)
Practicum Dec 7th (I practice every Thursday and Saturday until Dec 3rd when practice ends)
Exam #4 Dec8th
Final Dec 17th

As of tomorrow the 17th, 32 more days
Thanks to everyone telling me "you go girl" or Woot woot :)
It makes me happy that you guys know how hard I'm working
I want to make you proud
Good night everybody and sweet dreams

Oh and before I go, is there anything that you have on a wish list and is it for Christmas or just in general?


Sunday, November 01, 2009

Count with me

I'm feeling depressed, but instead of moping around about it
I'm going to count my blessings
...It's times like these when I remember why I still use this blog thing

  1. I am A+O x3, it's hospital lingo for alert and oriented to person, place and time, may not seem like much but if you didn't know where or when you were, or even who you were with a bunch of people in scrubs running around sticking tubes and pills down your throat, you'd appreciate it much more.
  2. speaking of A+O, I'm also fully ambulatory, that just means I can walk without the assistance of a cane or another person. Another simple blessing, better yet since I can move on my own I can turn in bed...again may not sound like much but people who are unable to move and are in bed all day get bed sores, some of those wounds tunnel through the skin right down to the bone (NOT EXAGGERATING)
  3. I can breathe on my own. Not that I have every experienced it for myself, but having a tracheotomy, a tube in your neck that you breathe through (a tube that gets built up with mucus after a while might I add a tube is stuck down that hole to clean it) ...well I'd guess it isn't entirely pleasant.
  4.  Even though I am struggling with school right now, I can still fix it. And even if this semester ends with me having to repeat my Nursing 120 class, I'll be able to. I still have one fail and one drop in this program, and though I would hate to use it, if I have to I will.
  5. Number 4 makes me think of my friends, one of my friends told me how I can still fix my situation and that the worst that could happen is I repeat this class (and she added that she knows people who have repeated and they did much better the second time around). Also another one of my friends told me basically not to worry about the things you can change, and not to put myself down.<--I'm still learning how to do that, but it's going to get better.
  6. My parents support my decision to go to school both financially and mentally. When my parents saw how hard I was working in school and crying about whether I'd pass or fail we had a long talk. We spoke about the what if's and the outcomes. They realize that I really want to become a nurse, but they also now realize how hard the path is to get there can be.
  7. I have a roof over my head, that doesn't leak. Also I have blankets and a heating pad to keep me warm.
  8. As far as I know, I have no major ailments
  9. I have all 5 of my senses working properly
  10. if god forbid nursing doesn't work out, there are other things I am good at. I can become an English professor or an ASL Interpreter....unfortunately those are the only things I can think of doing with myself besides nursing. However those are not bad options
So far that's all I can think of
I feel a little better,
I hope everything goes well in school this next month and a half
I'm praying and working as hard as I can

if anyone reads this, tell me your blessings




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